ATC in NYC

I woke up today and felt like death. My head was throbbing. I was covered in sweat. And when I tried to talk I sounded like Barry White after eating a hearty meal of sandpaper.  Work was not an option as I literally couldn’t will myself out of bed, but when I came to in the early afternoon and started wading through my e-mails, I started to get angry at myself.

What is it about being sick that bothers me so much?

I’ve been like this ever since elementary school. I know what you’re thinking… “What kind of self-respecting nine-year-old wouldn’t have jumped at the opportunity to eat popsicles and watch The Price Is Right all day?”  I had a tendency to get so caught up in thinking about how much information I would be missing and how much work I would have to do to get caught up that it almost wasn’t worth taking the day for myself.

I’m still like this.  Except instead of popsicles it’s hot tea and honey. And instead of The Price is Right it’s anything but The Price Is Right because Drew Carey cannot hold a candle to Bob Barker.

While much of my anti-sickness preoccupation is still centered upon agonizing over how much I’ll have to hustle to get back on top of e-mails and work-related items, I think it has  just as much to do with giving off the impression that I’m not perfect. (Shhhhh… don’t tell anyone.)

Seriously though, I’ve always been so dead-set on pleasing other people and proving to them that I am 100% capable of doing anything and everything passed my way that I forget to take care of myself in the process. Which is really dumb when you think about it. Because when I don’t take care of myself I know for a fact that it almost always leads to getting sicker. And that’s Bad News Bears on a whole new level.

I need to get better at this whole taking care of myself thing. Because, at this point, nobody else is doing it for me!

Nothing like a little R&R to put things into perspective. I spent the better part of my Christmas break adrift on the high seas with my madre and padre. It was just the stint I needed to come back and face the ridiculous New York cold with renewed energy.

The cruise itself was pretty fun. I’ve never been on one before and I liken it to summer camp for adults. You’re holed up with a bunch of people you will never see again for the rest of your life but you resolve to become best friends for seven days if only to make it through the mirage of organized games with some semblance of sanity. Next time I go, I’ll probably bring an entourage (or a good book… I caught up on TV movies and season 4 of “How I Met Your Mother” this time around), but the white sandy beaches and Caribbean air were just the ticket to relaxation. Which I needed. Like wo.

Now that I’m back in the city, I have to decide which one of my one trillion New Year’s resolutions I’m going to keep. I usually don’t make any, but this year I thought there’s so much I want to do that there’s no harm in at least saying I will do them and and if I don’t follow through no one will be the wiser.

One of them is to blog more. (I’m well on my way!)

Another is to use the one-year gym membership I spent a pretty penny on last summer and have neglected ever since. They sent me an e-mail this morning saying that my first six months with them I only got 6 out of a possible 24 new member medals. Wah Wah. As if I needed a reminder of my laziness. Or of my failed bid at this year’s Winter Olympics. It will get better though… as soon as it’s warm enough to walk to the gym every morning. Soooooo… April?

I also want to grocery shop instead of eating out all the time, learn the entire Adobe creative suite, take more pictures, go to church more, resurrect my other blog, go out more with new friends in this wonderful city, keep up more with old friends via phone and snail mail, get back into literature and floss daily.

Sound doable?